Baby Fever

My mother and I visited C's new baby, D, on Saturday. OMG. She's so adorable and I'm totally in love with her. She gives my niece L a run for her money in cuteness. C and S are both attractive people so I knew they wouldn't have an ugly baby, it also probably helps that I love her parents too. I've always known I wanted to have kids (preferably my own but I'm totally down with adoption if it comes to that) but being surrounded by babies really makes me want them RIGHT NOW. Which is not smart or really feasible or affordable right now but my hormones don't really care about any of that. I know I'm young and I have plenty of time, etc. but jeez.

I'm more okay with my job than not, I was just having a not so great day last time I posted. I applied for another job on campus. I've had an interview and I think it went really well so we'll see if I make it to round two. I like my job now but I think I'm ready for some new challenges. I was at my step-dad's Sunday for Father's Day and I was telling him about all this. He was saying there's nothing wrong with staying at a good job. It's different for most people now just with the economy and the way other things have changed (most people don't stay at the same place for 20 or even 10 years). Working for the state I have a lot of really awesome benefits that alot of people I know don't have. One of my coworkers and I were having a conversation about being a "lifer" i.e. in for the long haul at the university.  I think I would be okay with that. I need to get away from other people's opinion about what I should would could do and think about what would make me happy.

C and I are doing mostly good. Finally said the l word here recently. Being in love with her kinda freaks me out but I'm more okay with it now. We got in a fight the other night. I like to be right and can be kind of (okay, very) insistent when I know I am. She isn't as forceful as I am and will just back down. Which I don't like. I told her she needs to tell me to shut up and stop being an asshole. I need someone to tell me these things because most of the time I don't realize I come across that way. We also just process information and communicate differently. This is usually the source of our disagreements. We both think we're talking about the same thing but we're really not. I need people to be direct with me because otherwise I just don't get it. And I need to be more considerate of other people in general, and my girlfriend in particular. I've gotten better at it in the last few years but there is still much room for improvement.

The Killbillies are done for the season (unless by some chance we make it regionals). There's been some changes in coaching staff which seems to be going well so far. There will be some big changes before next season.....we'll see how that goes. Mostly good I think. The league has been exploding in size at a rate we have never seen before. Fayetteville and the Skatium have been very good to us.

Work work work

Some days, like today, I feel totally disillusioned and unhappy with my job. I like it for the most part but I take a lot of crap in my position. I don't want to do it forever but I'm not sure what exactly I want to do. If I do want to do something else, I'll have to leave here. I can't move up because I don't have any supervisory experience but I can't get any in the position I'm in. I like working for who I work for but it gets frustrating. With the economy the way it is, I'm not going to up and leave just because. I have a good boss, good benefits, and a pretty good work environment. I don't want to go back to school because quite frankly I don't enjoy it and there's nothing that I'm that interested in.
I enjoy administrative work but I currently see no way really for advancement. Part of it is that I like my benefits working for the state and so would prefer to move to another state job if I did move. Blah.

On the Upswing

This past weekend, I took my girlfriend out on a really fun date. Saturday we drove down to Ft. Smith and went thrift store shopping (led by N) which resulted in C finding a pair of awesome boots as well as some amusing pictures. After that, we went to The Park at West End which has an old school ferris wheel and carousel. We ate sno cones and took fun pictures. It was SO much fun. C really loves carnivals and this was almost like a mini one. There weren't very many people there either which was nice.
Sunday night we went to the drive-in to see Prince of Persia and Alice in Wonderland. C hadn't even been to the drive-in before and it was alot really nice. We snuck in drinks and snacks.
Monday I broke out my grill for the first tie this season and made asian grilled chicken, some citrus salmon, and corn on the cob. All in all, a lovely holiday weekend.\

C and S welcomed their baby girl today! I'm so happy for them. She's beautiful (just like I knew she would be!). I'm surrounded by babies. H is due at the end of June but she's in Alaska so I won't her for awhile. And one of my coworkers is also due at the end of June.

We're off to Lubbock, TX this weekend to play West Texas and then to KC the weekend after. The Backwoods Betties are hosting a regional tournament the weekend after and I'll be playing! I'm super excited. All derby, all the time. What did I do with all the free time I apparently had before I started laying rollerderby?

To Do List For The Next Few Days

1. Clean my house from top to bottom
2. Do laundry
3. Clean out all three of my closets
4. Do something with the laundry room
5. Clean up my deck (and buy some citronella candles)
6. Rearrange my living room
7. Possibly paint either the living room or kitchen or both
8. Take my girlfriend on a surprise adventure
9. Take Gizmo to the park
10. Enjoy my 3 day weekend :)

Halfway There and Back Again

Last weekend my mom, my girlfriend, and I drove 18+ hours to FL to visit my brother (who was home on leave from Iraq), my sister-in-law, and my niece. I seriously had my doubts about this but still wanted to go. I knew my mom would drive me crazy at some point because that's just a given. I was worried that I would want to kill C by the end of it all. But actually, it was a lovely trip. While my mom did still drive me a little crazy, C and I got along just fine and I had a wonderful time with my family. Watching my niece and my brother together are the cutest thing ever. They've been communicating through Skype and you would never know my niece hadn't seen her daddy in 6 months. My niece is amazing and she has amazing parents! They adore her and she adores them. She's pretty hilarious and I can't wait until she starts talking.

Things with C are good, very good. Scarily so to me because I always expect the worse I guess? A friend of mine pointed out that I'm way harder on my self and view myself as a lot more trouble than I really am. Which is nice to hear. We all have our little bits of crazy, it's just a matter of whether or not the god stuff outweighs the crazy. C certainly seems to think so and I just need to learn to be comfortable with that.

Lots of stuff coming up this summer- going to the Indigo Girls tonight at the AMP, Memorial Day weekend this weekend with a surprise day trip for my girl, bout in West Texas next weekend, bout in KC the weekend after that, Betties Regional Tournament the weekend after that. And a trip to Philly mid- July for SGI stuff. Also what to do 4th of July weekend?  I've been out of town the past two years in a row. I think I'd like to chill locally and grill, drink beer, and set off a bunch of fireworks. Possibly at my house if nothing else turns up. We'll see.

Oh summer how I do love thee.

Condoleezza Wanted To Play In The WNBA | The Frisky- Why Sports Are good For Women

Condoleezza Wanted To Play In The WNBA | The Frisky

This article is really awesome and highlights many of the reasons I enjoy playing rollerderby. I think people who have never played team sports underestimate the impact it can have on one's life. I came late to the athletics game having never played in high school or college but I can definitely say that it has made me a better person and I'm glad to be where I am.

Summer Here I Come

The school year is over! Oh how I love Fayetteville when students are gone. I know I wouldn't have a job and Fayetteville wouldn't have some of the awesome things it does without the college community and all that. But the lack of coeds in the street and traffic in the morning is quite nice.

My brother has made it halfway through his second tour of Iraq and his home on leave right now. Mom, C, and I are driving down to FL next weekend for a quick visit. I'm super excited about seeing everyone again! L is looking more and more like J every day. It's so hilarious. I wonder what she'll REALLY look like when she grows up and if people will think she's white. She's 3/4 so mostly, but we do live in the South. One drop is all it takes. She already has more olive skin than other babies and living in FL will only help it along. So far her hair is light brown leaning towards blond and curls when wet. Both her parents have thick hair that curls naturally so she'll have a serious head of hair at some point.

Mom is who suggested that C come along on our trip, partially so that we'd have another driver. I had my doubts about all that time in a car together but I think we'll be okay. The weather has been gorgeous there, perfect for the beach :). Hopefully I won't end my trip broken out in hives like last time.

Things between C and I are good I think. We're both guarded in different ways about different things but time is the only thing that will help with that. I think we're both doing better at communication. You would think as much as I like to talk I would be really good at it but unfortunately this is not the case; especially with people that are really important to me.

The Killbillies last home game of the season is this Saturday! We're playing Dallas Derby Devils who are ranked #4 in our region. We're ranked #10. We can beat them, the question is will we beat them? I sure hope so. Our season so far is 3-1 and I'd really like to continue our winning streak :). After this it's away games, one in West TX and the other in KC. Nothing says summer to me like traveling for the derb. Sometimes I wonder what I did with all my free time before I played rollerderby. I mean, I must have had a lot of it to be able to fit it into my life and still do other things. Who knows?