Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Spring What?

So on the first day of spring Fayetteville got over a foot of snow. I was in Memphis where it was a sunny 60-something degrees. Oh Arkansas how you disappoint me. This happens every year to some degree. It'll be warm and pretty and then the weather will get cold and nasty again. And every year I'm surprised. I don't know why. I've lived here for over 10 years. You would think I was used to it by now. But no. I'm still tricked every year.

Drove back from Little Rock on Sunday with R. We didn't see any snow until we hit Ft. Smith. Before that it was just rain. Stopped and visited N for a little while. That was nice. I haven't actaully seen her in a few years. We may hang out again next week when she's in the 'ville.

I'm leaving for FL the day after tomorrow! So excited to L and S. L gets more adorable every day. It's pretty ridiculous. I can't believe she's going to be 1 already! Also I'll get to see open water! Yay! Even though it'll just the Gulf. Oh I can't wait to spend some time on the beach! Sand between my toes, the sun on my skin, and the wind in my hair.

R seems pretty cool thus far :) We had a good time hanging out this weekend. He's coming to my game next month and we've made plans to go camping when it gets warm. I've discovered some things about myself- I think I usually go for people who are emotionally unavailable so that I'm not forced to open up or share myself. And because of my guardedness I also sometimes attract needy/clingy people. Why do I have to be so complicated? I'm working on trying to open up but damn it's hard. And I don't know why. I mean I know I'm afraid of getting hurt but I don't really know the reason behind it. I kind of feel like I'm doomed to be alone until I do figure it out or at least until someone likes/loves me enough to stick around while I try to figure it out. At least I'm aware of it.