Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Three Day Weekend.....Though It Seemed Like 5 or 6 Days

Unfortunately the Magic City Misfits lost to the St. Louis Gatekeepers but it was a really good game nonetheless. The officiating staff left much to be desired. It would help if the refs could keep up with the skaters. All in all it was a derby-ful weekend with LOTS of time spent at the rink. The Misfits are awesome skaters and people and I can't wait to see them play again.

I have a hard time accepting compliments from people in general, men in particular. I'm not entirely sure why. I guess some people I just don't take seriously? It also doesn't help when these compliments come from men who are otherwise unavailable. I mean, I know I'm beautiful but I guess it just doesn't carry the same weight as if some semi-attractive single guy told me. It probably doesn't help that dating in the 'ville is really not that great. I don't meet many "new" people because I've lived here along time and run with a certain group of people. I also don't do much besides work and derb. Maybe I need a new hobby that gets me out of the house. I think much of this goes hand in hand with me thinking that I'm alot of work as far as being a friend and romantic partner. I'm not sure how this got instilled in me but it sure has held fast in my psyche. People tell me this is not really the case but I don't really believe them.

Fall is finally actaully here. Temperatures in the 70's, the air feels a little chilly but there's some bright sun to warm you up. I think some camping should be in the works sometime soon :). Also: chili.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

It Could Be Worse But It Also Could Really Be Better

Things I'm excited about:
1. My trip to Florida for Thanksgiving
2. The Magic City Misfits bout this Sunday
3. Having a three day weekend
4. Sleeping in over previously mentioned three day weekend
5. Two new books I got for $0.99 each
6. My mom coming up for a long weekend in October

Things I'm not really excited about:
1. Being at work
2. Being single
3. Having former lovers try to persuade me it would be a good idea to have casual sex with them
4.  My mom being in Florida
5. All the email I've been getting lately

I don't know why I've been so blah lately. I still miss my mother a lot. And work has just been...frustrating for lack of a better word. I'm constantly interrupted and new things are always being added to my plate. I wouldn't have much problem with this except that these things always need to be done now so I constantly have half finished things while something else takes priority. Many of these things don't actaully need to be done "right now".

Being single isn't terrible and it's actaully kind of nice.  It's just my interactions with potential people are annoying and frustrating which is why I like being in a relationship if for no other reason than to not have to navigate the treacherous waters of the dating world.  Are they interested or are they not? What exactly is it that they're interested in? I'm not that great at reading signals and even when I think I am or someone helps me out I still crash and burn. I try not to think about it too much.

My mom sends me pictures just about every day with my niece's latest activities/exploits. It's pretty hilarious.  L already has a defined personality and it's so great to see how she interacts with the world around her.

Still no roommate but I haven't been looking very hard (or really at all). If it happens, it does. If not, oh well.

It's not quite fall yet but as is usual in Arkansas the weather hasn't quite made up it's mind yet. I think it's about to be camping time. It just need to cool off a bit first. 

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I'm missing things in my life

So apparently summer decided to take a nose dive straight into the nasty part of fall weather. I don't like cold weather at all but I do enjoy fall. Those cold mornings and warm sunny afternoons with the crispy smell of leaves in the air. Instead we have chilly, damp, rainy weather. This does not a happy Camille make. I like weather that you can wear a scarf with short sleeves and boots with no tights. Leaves are falling off trees but it's more because the heat killed them, then the slow slide towards winter.
I'm not much of a cheerful person in winter and this weather doesn't help me at all. Work has finally slowed down a bit so I can now take a deep breath. There may be some changes in the works but we'll see about that.
I miss my mom. I miss M and I miss J. I think it's partly just the time of year but also that I just miss some of my very favorite people. Just talking with them and spending time with them. This kind of weather makes me maudlin.
I still think C and I breaking up was the best decision though it makes me a little lonely. Some people are better as part of a couple and I think I'm one of those. I'm not saying I can't be happy alone because I can and have. I just do a bit better when I have someone to compliment me.
On the derby front- we're doing a private bout for Kraft Foods; there's a men's bout the week after that; and NWARD is otherwise gearing up for our 2011 season.
I need a roommate- who wants to live with me?